We are all aware that, especially for young children trying to comprehend equations and numbers, arithmetic may sometimes feel like a foreign language.
Being thrown into a universe where everything seems to be the same but doesn’t quite fit together is comparable to that. But in addition to having trouble with multiplication, it seems that our little hero is also enjoying the humorous aspects of math class.
Here it is:
A small child tells his father when he returns home from school,
“I got a F in math today.”
His father asks, “What happened?”
The child continues, “Well, my teacher asked me, ‘What’s 3 times 2?’ and I said 6.”
The father replies, “Oh, that’s right.”
“I understand,” the boy replies. Then she asked me, “What is two times three?”
The father then asks, “What the fuck is the difference?”
“I said that,” the boy answers.
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Do you fart in bed?
If this story doesn’t make you laugh so hard that you cry, tell me and I’ll say a prayer for you. This story tells the story of a couple who had been happily married for many years. The husband’s loud morning farts, which would wake his wife and make her gasp for air and scream, were the primary cause of strife in their marriage.
Every morning, she would plead with him to stop ripping them off as it was making her sick. He reassured her that he couldn’t stop it and that it was quite normal. She suggested that he see a doctor because she was afraid that one day he would blow his mind.
As the years went by, he continued to tear them out. She then had a malicious thought when she looked at the liver, gizzard, neck, and innards, among other spare parts, one Christmas morning while she was preparing the turkey and her husband was sleeping upstairs. She picked up the dish, went upstairs to her husband’s bedroom, and gently pulled down the bed linens and the elastic waistband of his underwear before spilling the bowl of turkey guts into his shorts. She heard her husband wake up with his usual trumpeting, then he screamed, sending shivers down her spine, and then he ran into the bathroom.
With tears in her eyes and uncontrollable laughter, the woman rolled around on the floor! After years of agony, she thought she had gotten him back rather well. About twenty minutes later, her husband came downstairs, looking shocked and wearing blood-stained underpants.
She bit her lip and asked him what was wrong. “You were right, honey,” he said. For years, you have cautioned me, but I have disregarded you. “What are you talking about?” his wife said. I finally farted my guts out today, like you always predicted, but it took two fingers and a little Vaseline to do it. Most of them, I think, are back in.
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